From Broken to Unbreakable: How to Lock In and Use Pain to Forge Your Future

I came out after a long day at the office to a text,

"I change my mind, I don't want this.

Take care of yourself."

Then blocked.

No explanation. No warning. No mercy .

My entire body was in shock.

I froze at the traffic lights on the main road in front of my office.

"Bro. She just left me."

My stomach dropped. My heart rose to clog my throat. My head spun.

It felt like I had been punched in the liver.

'An avoidant discard', they call it. I was thrown away like dirty tissue.

A flood of negative emotions submerged me at once.

A flood resembling Noah's.

A flood of rage, confusion and betrayal.

That night, I remember walking all the way home in silence.

The carefully cultivated garden of my mind became an infested wasteland.

I was at war with myself.

"Why did she go?

Did I ever matter?

Is she talking to someone else?"

I sat on my favourite bench along the river and just sat still.

Every second replayed in my head like surveillance footage. But no answer made it feel better.

So I got up and walked.

Dawdled, like a zombie. A second from collapsing on every step.

Satan bombarded me with a thousand intrusive thoughts, all reminding me of what I knew and had ignored for too long:

"You're broke!"

"You're weak!"

"You have such a dead life!"

I couldn't feel any worse, so these shouts didn't hurt me.

They were all true.

This was my FTE.

When all your flaws, weaknesses, bad habits and forgotten dreams come to surface.

That pause in time when you can only look up and sigh,

"Wallahi, I'm finished."

You know the feeling.

You’re at rock bottom.

The job loss. The heartbreak. The spiritual collapse.

Maybe it wasn't a girl.

Maybe it was a business deal gone wrong. A client ghosted the invoice you hoped to pay rent with…after not paying it for months.

Maybe it was failing the exam you spent months grinding for.

Or a sudden, crushing realisation you're not where younger you thought you'd be.

Imagine if 10-year-old you saw you right now.

Saw the state of your body. Your room. Your camera roll. Your secret folder.

Your miserable day-to-day routine.

He'd be ashamed. You'd be embarrassed.

"What happened? Why are you a loser?"

Normie Advice

Heartbroken. An empty husk, you immediately seek escape.

The entire world tells you to run from the pain.

"Bro, come out tonight. Let’s get active, you'll replace her"

"Big man, order yourself a fat munch and a dessert. Food heals everything."

"Bro, you need to travel. Get away. Book that solo trip. Change the scenery."

But deep down, you know it's all a facade.

It's all just numbing the pain, not addressing it.

Testosterone. Dopamine. Adrenaline.

They'll tell you some hormones will fix your chronic issues.

It won't. Only deep reflection and intentional action will.

You're in a deep, dark well, and instead of throwing you a ladder for you to see light…

They throw you a matchstick instead.

You can’t change because you don’t know what to change.

You haven’t changed because you believe there is too much to change.

You won’t change because the few comforts you enjoy—porn, video games, IG reels—numb the desire to build a new life.

Enough!

Have you not had enough? Is it not time to escape?

Why are you satisfied with just a matchstick?!

Why are you satisfied with the bare minimum

Do you not want freedom?

Do you not want to win?

Repeat this to yourself.

"I never want to feel like this again. I refuse to. I never will."

"I never want to feel like this again. I refuse to. I never will."

"I never want to feel like this again. I refuse to. I never will."

This won't happen overnight.

(You'll probably cry yourself to sleep two nights in a row.)

But at some point soon, it'll hit you: you don't have to accept sitting at the bottom.

You can change.

You can escape.

You can succeed.

Get Mad At Where You Are

"But how do I get out?"

That’s what I asked myself the following day.

No one was going to save me.

Not her.

Not my boys. Not my manager. It was on me.

Let’s be real: You deserve to be miserable.

Years of poor choices led to this point.

Skipping salah. Stopping gym. Neglecting your social life.

Getting comfortable with your mediocre salary.

And, let's be honest, accepting a woman who you knew wasn't good for you.

So if you keep living the same way? Scrolling, skipping duties, chasing dopamine…Nothing’s going to change.

Be disgusted with where you’re at.

Properly sick of it.

Make a vow.

No more distractions. No more excuses. No more lies.

Stop running and start confronting.

Use the anger, hatred and self-pity as weapons of war.

It's time to go to war with your problems.

It's time to go to war with your bad habits.

It's time to lock in.

But first…

Go for a walk

No phone. Just you, some fresh air, and your feet moving forward…

One step at a time.

Ground yourself.

Take a mental note of:

1. 3 things you can hear (e..g the birds, traffic, airplanes up above..)

2. 3 things you can feel (e.g the wind, the slight chill, your feet aching)

3. 3 things you can smell

4. 3 things you can see

When I focused just on walking, omdelighting at the birds' songs above me, on the crisp morning air, the shadows of leaves swaying across ground, and the noble river Soar burbling from afar, all my worries and regrets were silenced.

The moment you stop distracting yourself…

The moment you go silent, sit in the ruins of your life, and stare the truth in the face—

That’s when your power comes back.

You realise:

“I don’t want her back. I want my power back.”

You realise:

“I don’t need to escape—I need to rebuild. Brick by brick.”

Once you have a mission that guides you, and your rage to fuel you, nothing can stop you.

With a strategic plan and decisive action, results are guaranteed.

Your walk changes. Your eyes get sharper. Your speech slows. Your mind calms. Your heart softens. You feel Allah’s gaze on you constantly.

They will notice in time…and you won't even care.

You will have no need for anyone else's approval.

You will go to sleep excited for tomorrow.

You will wake up excited for the day.

Only Allah, your mission and your family will matter.

Then, you find true success.

And when she comes back, you could not care less…

How to LOCK IN.

This is how we turn pain into hope.

From the Fire to the Future

Before you build your dream life, you need to see both ends:

The Hell you’re heading towards—

and the Heaven you could reach.

1. Jahannam Scenario

Write this down. Describe your future self if you don’t change.

• Your weak body.

• A mediocre job you’re too afraid/comfortable to quit

• A woman who's not attracted to you

• Children that don't respect you

• Trapped in debt

• A lonely, miserable retirement

You don’t need to go to Hell to feel it. Living like this? You’re already there.

Let that disgust fuel you.

The Jannah Scenario

Flip the script.

You’re a man of strength, presence, and mission.

You spend a decade locking in.

• You speak multiple languages fluently.

• You own a multi-million pound business

• You provide for your family — your mother, your wives, your children.

• You’ve mastered land, sea, and sky: cars, motorcycles, yacht.

• You wake with purpose and sleep with clarity.

• Men of honour, strength, and vision surround you.

• You are helpful, needed and appreciated by your community

This life is not a fantasy. It’s your Fitrah. It’s what you were made for.

If you Lock In!

Ghost Mode

Disappear for 3 months

Start by accepting 3 things.

1. You are invisible.

2. You are worthless.

3. You can only improve from here.

Since you are an invisible, worthless beginner who wants to improve, I want you to throw your brain and ego aside.

Your opinion does not matter.

You clearly don't know how to win, otherwise you wouldn't be here.

You will listen. And you will obey.

To start: say bye to your social life. Say bye to your online 'social life' too.

You're going to hide for 3 months minimum.

You are going to suffer.

Then, in 3 months, you will win.

Phase 1: Demolition

Your old self must die.

You are your habits, and these are the habits that made you a weak, confused and hopeless. No more.

Kill your old self. Let these go. Today.

These are now Haram for you (if it isn't already)

• Video Games.

• Porn

• Alcohol/Drugs

• Any social media you don't post on. Delete them.

• Degenerate/ friends

• Having women in your phone

• Snacks, sweets, trash food.

• The mainstream news

Phase 2: Foundation

You are now a new man.

A man with clarity, who can finally see the light. Starting with a clean slate.

Deep breath, we've got work to do.

Compulsory upon you

Soul Fardh (If you are Muslim).

For a rejuvenated heart and peaceful mind.

• All 5 Salah on time

• 1 page of Qur'an. Listened, recited or read in your language.

• Du'a in Sujood in Fajr and 'Isha

• 2 Rak'ah when you wake up

• 2 Rak'ah before bed

• Sadaqah, charity or sharing something everyday (even a bite of your food)

Mind Fardh.

Bringing order and life to your mind.

• Daily journaling, morning or night.

• 10 minutes of reading (I'd say an hour, but I know most of you don't read)

• Daily walk, no phone/music

Body Farḍh.

Strengthen, maintain and nourish your soul's vessel.

• Quantified daily exercise (100 pushups)

• Clean food + hydration

• Respect your sleep

Creative Farḍh

If you’re building online.

• Write daily (200 words min)

• Weekly long-form post or letter

• 30 min/day researching your skill

• 3 short-form posts/day. One to teach, one to inspire, one to relate with.

Phase 3: Construction

Now that the foundation is in place, begin with one project.

• Writing

• Starting a business

• Gym transformation

• Qur’an memorisation

• Building a personal brand

Set a difficult, 3-month goal…and work backwards.

Benching your bodyweight.

Hitting 1000 followers.

Memorising 3 Juz.

Break down your goals into monthly and weekly objectives.

Then, into daily habits you need to do to achieve them.

Every day. For 90 days.

Remember, you are a beginner. So you have no right to an opinion.

None of the above is optional.

Hear and obey.

Phase 4 (Bonus): Furbishment

Freedom requires structure and systems. Here’s how I built mine:

• Content platform (Threads or X)

• Email list (Beehiiv, ConvertKit)

• Product store (Stan, Gumroad)

• Templates + planners (Notion)

• AI support

• Writing software (Grammarly, Kortex, Google Docs)

You don't need all of this at once. But this is what lets me make money, write daily, and walk in peace.

The Promise

Let me be clear:

I'm not rich (yet). I don't have a six-figure business (yet).

I still eat at home. Still live with family. Still live off a 9-5.

But I walk like I own the road.

I speak like a man who has something to say.

I wake up excited and go to sleep even more so.

Because I know exactly what I should be doing with my life,

Exactly what I'm building.

And exactly what it takes to get there.

And that confidence?

That calm?

That clarity?

It's better than any amount of money I've ever had.

I don't promise you millions.

I promise you a mission.

A mind free from chaos.

A body you respect.

A soul stirred by passion and achievement.

And from there?

The money comes. The women come. The wins come.

The version of you you were always meant to become... finally arrives.

P.S. If you're ready to move from survival to mission, I built a 7-Day Rebuild to guide you. It's free, packed with tools, and made for men who are tired of drowning.

You can join it here.

Start today. One decision changes everything.

Until the next one,

Hamza.